The Big Bang

No, not how the universe was created, but the bar, on the landing in St Louis. That's where I ended up tonite. I was supposed to meet some friends at a bar, but the directions that I got were all jacked, so I went down to the place I used to work, and decided to see what was up. http://www.thebigbangbar.com

I show up and notice right away there is an inordinate amount of bacholorette parties occupying the bar.

Now, I don't want to give the impression that I am UNHAPPY for these people who have a pending marriage, but do I really need to hear her, and ALL her friends shriek all night about how "SHE'S GETTING MAAAAAARRRRIIIIIIEEEEEED!" for four or five fucking hours? Okay lady, you convinced somebody that YOUR vagina is the best he will EVER have, why do I have to cheer for you?

ANYHOW, the crowd was in good spirits, which is always a good thing. It lends to the show. Oh, if you havent been, or heard, the Big Bang is a bar that has "rock n roll dueling pianos", which SOUNDS a tad bit gay, but is actually a damn fine entertainment concept. Two guys playing pianos, playing requests and telling jokes, and singing to Bachelorettes, birthday boys and girls, and people on their anniversary, etc. Its a good time.

While walking from the bar with my Red Bull on the rocks, I get ambushed by a big hug from a little girl, who happens to be a girl I formerly worked with at Missouri Baptist Medical Center. She was there celebrating her birthday. It is always nice to see people you LIKE from places you DIDN'T like, and see them having fun and a good time. Luckily my bartender friend Brad (thanks for the free Red Bull Brad! ) hooked me up with some tastey drink for my friend Erin. She seemed very impressed with whatever it was, and was passing it around her table making her friends taste it.
ANYHOW, back on track, I go to the bathroom to, well, to use it, and I see a SMALL pair of boots under the stall door. A few seconds later, I notice they arent in the proper "peeing" position, and I peek down a bit and see that, yes indeed, somebody is receiving oral in the bathroom stall. Good times, good memories for two lucky people!

The band played all the usual songs, and I had a good time. Left early, since it IS a bit of a drive for me.

But, if you are ever downtown, I highly recommend it! 809N Second St, St Louis MO!

Thank you Mr Mellencamp

Oh yeah life goes on
Long after the thrill of livin is gone
John Cougar Mellencamp



Well, it seems here lately that life does indeed go on. And, rest assured, I am feeling that the thrill of life has passed me by. Going out the other day reaffirmed this for me. I had neither fun, nor excitement, the way a simple trip to the corner bar used to provide. I am not sure if its a culmination of all the stress and bullshit and heartache I have been through as of late, but whatever it is, it fucking sucks.

I cant seem to shake the feeling that, "what if I've already had the GOOD part of my life". Is that possible? I mean, at 35 soon to be 36, is it possible that the best years of my life are behind me?

I mean, if they are, I cant really complain too much. I've been around the world three times. I've met some of the most fascinating people on the planet. Sat inside the Roman Colluseum, had lunch on the steps at the Vatican, swam in the middle of the Meddeterenean Sea, Snorkled off a corla reef in San Jaun, Sand Surfed in Kuwaiit, sw the monkeys at the Rock of Gibralter, been to a real live gold souk, slept in the same hotel that Princess Di did, and so much more.

So why then does it seem as if its not enough? Am I being selfish? Childish?
Is it wrong to want to meet somebody who I can fall head over heels in love with, and have them feel the same, instead of it being one sided?

I dont know, it just seems lately, the thrill isnt there anymore. The thrill of the chase isnt even there.

Maybe this is what getting old feels like.

Getting old sucks.